Q. I’m finding it really hard to deal with the stress and pressure my clients put on me at the moment. They’re pushing for updates, but sometimes it’s not possible to give the information they want. I then feel really overwhelmed and stressed out. How can I deal with this better?
When someone next to you yawns, you’re likely to yawn, too, even if you’re not tired. Similarly, when a stressed-out client demands an update, their tone can make you mirror their anxiety, leaving you stressed as well.
Research shows stress is an ‘emotional contagion’ – it can spread from one person to another remarkably quickly. This is due to mirror neurons, brain cells that mimic the actions and emotions of others. While this helps us be empathetic and understanding, we don’t want to absorb the stress and anger of others.
So, how do you break the pattern?
Recognise a ‘stress tornado’ when it hits and remind yourself that it’s an external force trying to sweep you up, but you have the power to resist.
Remember that for you, this process is business as usual, but for your client, it’s often new, scary territory. Review your communication and ensure you are clear with time frames and expectations. If you’re working well and things are progressing as they should, then those stress-inducing calls and messages may be unwarranted.
Resist the urge to vent. While it can feel good in the moment, it often just transfers your stress to others. Instead, try journalling for a healthier release. Spend a few minutes each day writing free-flowing streams of consciousness, letting your emotions surface. Then close the journal and move on.
If you’re putting constant pressure on yourself to work around the clock, honey, you need to stop. You won’t be any good to anyone if you run yourself into the ground.
Have a question for our expert psychotherapist Bronwyn Penhaligon? Send your questions to [email protected]
Or, if you feel you need more support, you can visit penhaligons.com.au to schedule a one-on-one appointment.
